Most of my closed are are either married, or tunang orang or mak orang. So basically mentality aku pn da sama terikat macak dia orang because most of the time our main conversation mesti regarding anak-anak, suami and ape nk masak untuk husband malam ni.
" nok, ape nak masak erh malam ni? aku penat la.. kalo suruh laki aku masak, kira aku berdosa tak?"...
Im like "really?".....
I sometimes get sick and tired kept on listening to them talking about how their life went. Dont get me wrong is not that i dont like them sharing stories and stuff. Its just at this point of time,i always wondering, *bila pulak turn aku nak bercerita kat depa?* So its kinda difficult for me apparently. Surrounded by all these people yang actually do have a life.
Me and Che Mat have been discussing alot about our plans for next 2 years and we were pretty happy and extremely excited about it.We do want to get married as soon as possible but as for now we're just not fully ready for it.Before this, i havent given alot of thought about marriage.So i have plan my life throught out of my entire life. Graduating by 26, taking master by 28, Divisional Manager and taking PHD by 30, travel around Europe alone by 35, Buy Nissan GTR by 50 and by a house more than i can afford by 60.. See, thats how i plan my life.Pretty sweet ain it? But then Che Mat came along.He kinda makes me shuffle's all my life plans. But in a very good way.He somehow took all my plan and mixed them with his plan and all the sudden he came up with a brand new plan for us. It just beyond awesome.
Sometimes aku risau jugak sebab my original is always my no.1 priority. Im working my butt of all this while because i life up to my plans. Tapi bila pikirkan balik. Rasa macam 'is it going to work?'. So maty times i told Che Mat im not going to quit my job just because im married. Im not built to be a full time housewife. Thats just not me. I want to have atleast Master in my hand and a successful career to support my lifestyle. I just cant depend on my husband to buy me a three thousand ringit worth of Prada handbags and shoes right?
Che Mat at first wasnt okay with it but later as he understand my true intention, his being supportive about it.
I love my moms life , i mean when she was working with Telekom as a senior Division Manager afew years ago before she quits her job and become full time housewife's.My mom is super awesome. Because she can balance her work life and her marriage life with her husband and children. She woke up early every morning cooking for us before she head to work so that her husband and children have something to eat during lunch and dinner because she always came home pretty late almost everyday.She will make sure the house in he right order, all the clothes are folded, iron and organized.Before she off to bed, she will spend atleast afew hours checking my homework and check up on thing with me with school. She did that without ANY help.She can juggle everything.I look up to her so much i wish that one day if i ever get married, i want to be like her.
But then since my mom stop working, she managed to keep her life busy. Attending agama class almost everyday so at least she has time for herself.So one fine day as usualy me and my mom had a mother-daughter talk. She asked me what i am going to do after i graduate. So i told her im taking Master in MBA and Development Psychology. My mom was pretty impress but then she said
"do whatever makes you happy".
So i guess that shes okay with my plan. But then all the sudden i realized something.Aku teringat one of my guy friend pernah bagitau something dekat aku.
"Tugas seorang isteri untuk terhadap suami nya bukan hanya melayan suami or ayat carutnye sex. Marriage is more than just sex. Its about sharing your life with someone who you love, adore and crazy about for the rest of your life.Husband is like a lil boy who constantly want your attention even when your not arround. If your can give that kind of commitment to your husband despite your a working lady, then your ready to get married. If you dont, dont waste our time!!"
Its like a slap in the face.Aku tak pernah pergi kursus khawin so i dont know much about marriage life. But from what i know, marriage is not easy. You have to work for it..So i rethink about about my plan on getting master and PhD. Then is said to myself:-
Perempuan tu maybe seorang CEO atau manager sekalipun, sebesar mana gaji dia dari suami dia, sebanyak mane paperwork or report dia kene sign di office, bile die balik rumah, shes' a mom, and a wife. No more branded handbags or shoes to wear, no more paperwork or report to sign, tugas utama dia adalah cook, clean and put the food on the table for her family.
So, even aku still nak continue Master and have a very succesfull career, my family will always be my priority.Mabye dulu i can find a sense of happiness bile dapat pakai branded shoes, handbags, make up and everything. But now all the happiness i need is a family of my own.
" nok, ape nak masak erh malam ni? aku penat la.. kalo suruh laki aku masak, kira aku berdosa tak?"...
Im like "really?".....
I sometimes get sick and tired kept on listening to them talking about how their life went. Dont get me wrong is not that i dont like them sharing stories and stuff. Its just at this point of time,i always wondering, *bila pulak turn aku nak bercerita kat depa?* So its kinda difficult for me apparently. Surrounded by all these people yang actually do have a life.
Me and Che Mat have been discussing alot about our plans for next 2 years and we were pretty happy and extremely excited about it.We do want to get married as soon as possible but as for now we're just not fully ready for it.Before this, i havent given alot of thought about marriage.So i have plan my life throught out of my entire life. Graduating by 26, taking master by 28, Divisional Manager and taking PHD by 30, travel around Europe alone by 35, Buy Nissan GTR by 50 and by a house more than i can afford by 60.. See, thats how i plan my life.Pretty sweet ain it? But then Che Mat came along.He kinda makes me shuffle's all my life plans. But in a very good way.He somehow took all my plan and mixed them with his plan and all the sudden he came up with a brand new plan for us. It just beyond awesome.
Sometimes aku risau jugak sebab my original is always my no.1 priority. Im working my butt of all this while because i life up to my plans. Tapi bila pikirkan balik. Rasa macam 'is it going to work?'. So maty times i told Che Mat im not going to quit my job just because im married. Im not built to be a full time housewife. Thats just not me. I want to have atleast Master in my hand and a successful career to support my lifestyle. I just cant depend on my husband to buy me a three thousand ringit worth of Prada handbags and shoes right?
Che Mat at first wasnt okay with it but later as he understand my true intention, his being supportive about it.
I love my moms life , i mean when she was working with Telekom as a senior Division Manager afew years ago before she quits her job and become full time housewife's.My mom is super awesome. Because she can balance her work life and her marriage life with her husband and children. She woke up early every morning cooking for us before she head to work so that her husband and children have something to eat during lunch and dinner because she always came home pretty late almost everyday.She will make sure the house in he right order, all the clothes are folded, iron and organized.Before she off to bed, she will spend atleast afew hours checking my homework and check up on thing with me with school. She did that without ANY help.She can juggle everything.I look up to her so much i wish that one day if i ever get married, i want to be like her.
But then since my mom stop working, she managed to keep her life busy. Attending agama class almost everyday so at least she has time for herself.So one fine day as usualy me and my mom had a mother-daughter talk. She asked me what i am going to do after i graduate. So i told her im taking Master in MBA and Development Psychology. My mom was pretty impress but then she said
"do whatever makes you happy".
So i guess that shes okay with my plan. But then all the sudden i realized something.Aku teringat one of my guy friend pernah bagitau something dekat aku.
"Tugas seorang isteri untuk terhadap suami nya bukan hanya melayan suami or ayat carutnye sex. Marriage is more than just sex. Its about sharing your life with someone who you love, adore and crazy about for the rest of your life.Husband is like a lil boy who constantly want your attention even when your not arround. If your can give that kind of commitment to your husband despite your a working lady, then your ready to get married. If you dont, dont waste our time!!"
Its like a slap in the face.Aku tak pernah pergi kursus khawin so i dont know much about marriage life. But from what i know, marriage is not easy. You have to work for it..So i rethink about about my plan on getting master and PhD. Then is said to myself:-
Perempuan tu maybe seorang CEO atau manager sekalipun, sebesar mana gaji dia dari suami dia, sebanyak mane paperwork or report dia kene sign di office, bile die balik rumah, shes' a mom, and a wife. No more branded handbags or shoes to wear, no more paperwork or report to sign, tugas utama dia adalah cook, clean and put the food on the table for her family.
So, even aku still nak continue Master and have a very succesfull career, my family will always be my priority.Mabye dulu i can find a sense of happiness bile dapat pakai branded shoes, handbags, make up and everything. But now all the happiness i need is a family of my own.
Working mom is not an easy thing for most of us
Is not going to be easy. I know but its worth the try.
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